Berlin, GERMANY, July 8, 2016: Pamela (not her real name), 34, inside her room inside at a women’s shelter. “I gave up everything for my husband: my job, my friends, my city everything”, she recalls. Shortly after moving to his birth town with her alcoholic husband, he became violent. He destroyed half the household, then called the police and blamed it on her. A police officer informed her she was experiencing domestic violence. “Domestic violence – me? No way! That’s something that happens to other women, not me”, Pamela said. She defended her husband towards the police. He continued to slap her, until one day he battered her brutally. “You don’t deserve better”, he said. “The worst wasn’t the physical violence, it was the emotional cruelty”, she said. “He’d always tell me how shitty I look and how fat and lazy I was”. When her husband’s declared that he didn’t marry her out of love but because of his personal bankruptcy, she packed her bags and sought refuge at a women’s shelter in Berlin. “Even when I realized that I didn’t love him anymore, I could still feel the emotional dependency. For six years he was by my side, always telling me how I’d never achieve anything in life without him.” “My life was fine until I met him: I had a good job, my apartment, my friends. I never thought anyone would be able to turn my whole world upside down. He completely isolated me. Coming to the women’s shelter was the best decision. Today I am 100 percent certain that I won’t go back to him.”
Bedburg, GERMANY, September 17, 2015: My grandmother, Helga v. Randow, was 92 years old when she was diagnosed with dementia. Shortly afterwards, she was admitted into a closed medical facility as her disease had deteriorated. Five months later, Helga passed away. Helga's grace and courage never seized to amaze and inspire me.
